My visit to The New Life Centre:

I had the great honor of hanging out with Rennie Joubert and getting to hear her story last Saturday. Rennie, 74, a retired accountant, runs the New Life Centre - a Christian centre in Belleville Cape Town that accommodates women in crisis pregnancy - with her husband Wietz Joubert, 78.

Not only is she the house mother of the New Life Centre but also does spiritual counselling with the ladies at the New Life Centre, and has even delivered 3 of the babies who were born at the home!

There have been 445 adoptions, 176 women who chose to be single parents, 1 miscarriage, 3 phantom pregnancies and 4 still-born or babies who died shortly after birth at the centre over the past 20 years.

I asked her some questions about the home:

How many years has the home been running and how many women have been accommodated by the New Life Centre?

The home started 20 years ago, the same year that abortion was legalized, and over the years there have been 629 girls and women pass through the home. The youngest girl was just 11 years old and the oldest 42 years old. The home can accommodate 10 ladies at a time although, if the home is full, we pull out mattresses and the ladies sleep on the floor.

How much does it cost to run this home each month?

Around R25 000 a month for the running of the home, petrol and medical costs.

Do these women receive medical care from the government?

Yes. The women give birth at Karl Bremer Hospital and we have had a very positive experience over the years with this hospital. Dr Deal at Durbanville Medi Clinic does scans for us free of charge. Most of the ladies give birth naturally and there have been 3 births at the home as the ladies did not get to the hospital in time, so I delivered 3 of the babies myself, and one of them was breech!

Where do you receive your money from each month?

It really comes from God! The Ministry of the Belleville Methodist Church give us the house for free each month and some of the members assist with money and groceries each month. We also receive money from The Community Chest.

What "qualifies" as a crisis for girls and women to come to the home and what does a "crisis" pregnancy mean?

Being homeless, being kicked out of the family home or shunned by the family, drug abuse, and girls and women not being emotionally ready to be a mother to the baby that they are carrying.
We do not discriminate and all women of all walks are welcomed. We have had atheist and Muslim ladies come to us as there are no crisis pregnancy centres in the Muslim communities.
Women who return a second time in a second crisis pregnancy are also not turned away but rather welcomed back. Our first priority is to try and unite the girls and women with their families.

Is the home very strict? Are girls and women allowed visitors?

No drugs or drinking is allowed and friends and relatives may visit but preferably not boyfriends. The girls rotate a chore list and take turns to cook and clean.

What is the road that you walk with the ladies if they choose to put the baby up for adoption?

The New Life Centre works with Pro Care so
the process is therefore a "private' adoption and the ladies can choose the family that will adopt their baby.
Once the mother has given birth to the baby she may see the baby and meet the baby if she wants to. The baby is then taken to the "baby room" while she recovers. The mother is encouraged to say good bye to the baby back at the home. The mother has 60 days to change her mind and keep her baby if she chooses to. In this time a Kangaroo mom will collect the baby with a court order. Post adoption agreement letters are decided between the social worker, the adoptive parents and the birth mother.
We try keep the ladies here as long as possible after the birth and we do post birth counselling.

I am under the impression that a private adoption is very expensive and this is often what puts many people off the idea of adopting privately. Is it true that a private adoption can cost up to R100 000?

No not at all! It works on a sliding scale and depends on your income. This allows anyone to adopt and it doesn't mean that because someone is very wealthy that they will necessarily be good parents and it would not be fair to lower income families who wish to adopt. 


Do girls receive any skills training while at the home?

Yes they do - they do a computer course and they learn to cook and clean. There is a lady who comes in to do antenatal classes with the ladies and a midwife who comes to see them at home as well.
A lady comes in to teach them to crochet and another lady comes to do guest house training with them.  We are currently looking for someone to train the ladies customer service skills, so someone who can commit an hour a week to the ladies in the home.

What are your needs and how can people get involved and support the home?

If there are specific skills that anyone feels that they can train the ladies in we would appreciate them volunteering their time. We will appreciate the donation of books, toiletries and clothes and financial donations are welcomed.



So as you can see Rennie and her husband are making a difference in South Africa, one crisis pregnancy at a time and Rennie says she wants to give God all the glory for the strength and grace He gives her.

If you would like to get involved in training the ladies or volunteering please contact Rennie and The New Life Centres bank account details are on their website.

If you know anyone who is in crisis pregnancy please share this information with them and encourage youth pastors and pastors to raise awareness and preach about the different crisis pregnancy centres in your area. 

Link to their website.

www.newlifecentre.co.za

To the girl/woman considering abortion:

I do not know who you are or how you got to this place of contemplating aborting your baby but please hear my story so that you can make an informed decision.

I was 14 years old but behaved like a 19 year old, doing things and going places that were not legal yet, and if my mother tried to stop me I would run away from home. I was an angry teenager acting out because I was sexually abused as a child and acting out because my father walked out on us. I was angry and out of control.
I began to notice that I was gaining weight on my stomach and wondered if I could be pregnant but reasoned that it would never happen to me.
I didn't want a baby so therefore, in my mind, I would not have a baby or become pregnant until I wanted to.
Nonetheless I took a pregnancy test and was shocked to learn that I was pregnant.

My boyfriend at the time (lets call him David) and I decided that we were both too young to become parents. He wanted to finish school, and I was convinced that I would be the worst mother on earth as I could hardly take care of myself, never mind a baby.
Neither of our families were financially well off, and my mother was a single mother so I reasoned that aborting my baby would be the best solution because neither of our families could afford a baby.

I made sure not to tell any of my friends so that no one would be able to talk me out of it.

On the day of my abortion I bunked school and my boyfriend had a motorbike to drive us to the clinic.
We arrived early, just after 8am, and I filled in the paper work. I used an alias name, the nurses didn't even ask for an I.D. An ultrasound was done to confirm the pregnancy and to see how far along I was. I was 14 weeks along. I remember seeing the little jellybean on the screen and hearing the heart beat. I remember thinking, "Get it out, just get this thing out of me!"

Next, the nurse took me to the next room and crushed up two tablets and stuck them deep inside of me. She explained that I would experience some cramping, and that we had to wait a few hours until the fetal tissue was ready to be removed. She never once called my baby a baby and when I asked her if the fetus would feel anything she told me that it would not because it wasn't fully developed yet.

So David and I went to the nearest shopping centre and walked around and had a milkshake while we waited for our baby to die. I had a few cramps but was convinced that I was doing the right thing. After all, this baby would be better off without me.

At midday we went back to the abortion clinic and I was given a hospital gown to change into. There were other women in the waiting room dressed in hospital gowns too, all lined up for there 'procedure', as the nurses called it.

One by one they went in, and all came out crying. No one said a word or comforted one another. Then it was my turn to go in.

Up until then I had managed to keep my head high and face brave, but when I lay on that bed and the next ultrasound was done, I started crying hysterically. It hit me. The reality of killing my own child hit me and it was too late to do anything about it.
I saw the jelly bean again on the screen but this time there was no heart beat, just silence.
My feet were put up in stirrups and the abortionist took a long needle and stuck it deep inside of me. The pain was overwhelming and I kicked at him and resisted and closed my legs. Angrily he said, "Do you want to die? If I don't suck her out you will die!" Her. It was a girl. "What other options do I have?" I asked. "You could go to the hospital but then your family will find out and I am guessing that you don't want that."

I opened my legs again and let him continue as hot tears streamed down my face.

I listened as the fetus was sucked out and heard the sound of the parts falling into the red waste bad that said "Human Waste.'' It sounded like mud being thrown onto a plastic bag.

I went back to the waiting room where the other women and girls sat but warm blood started streaming down my legs and the pain was unbearable. A nurse put a linen saver under my bum and I sat there, bleeding and cramping and weeping and feeling like the worst person on earth.

After the abortion I really struggled. I became so depressed that I wanted to sleep all day. I cried so much and it was all too much for David to handle. 
We broke up shortly after.

I met my husband and fell madly in love and married him when I was 19 and had my daughter when I was 20. When I held my daughter in my arms for the first time the guilt came back to haunt me. I was holding a baby. A baby. Like the one I disposed of.

I was diagnosed with post natal depression and put on medication but the guilt and dark thoughts never left me. I decided that the right thing for me to do was to commit suicide... my daughter deserved a better mother and my husband a better wife so it was the right thing to do. I would be doing them a favor.

So I wrote my suicide notes and wrote the hardest letter I have ever had to write, to my daughter....explaining why it would be better if i didn't stick around.
God knows I was going to do it. I had made up my mind that I was going to do it.
But in my dark moment of extreme desperation I called out to God and said "If you are real, please.... NOW would be a good time to reveal it!"

God revealed Himself to me and for the first time in my life I felt a supernatural peace that cannot be explained. Up until that point I had always felt so uneasy, so on edge, but that night I experienced peace. 

A friend who had been praying for me had given me a Bible and I stared reading it and as I asked questions in my mind the answers were appearing on the page! It was like I was having a conversation with God. Sounds crazy I know but this was my experience and it has changed me on such a deep level. I made the decision to become a Christian and asked God to help me live as I was not strong enough enough to do it alone.

I know what it feels like to be weak.
I know what it is like to feel so deadly alone and afraid.
I know what it is like to have no hope.
I have been there. I have experienced the overwhelming reality of being in a crisis pregnancy. I have suffered the loss of losing a baby girl to abortion to the point where I almost killed myself just to end the pain.

Abortion is not a quick fix. There is no quick fix once you are in a crisis pregnancy. The other roads and the other options will also have challenges but ask yourself this, what will you regret more? Abortion? Or choosing life for your baby?

There are many crisis pregnancy centers in our country but sadly girls and women do not know their options. Abortion is widely marketed as being a cheap, painless and easy procedure. Believe me, abortion is not cheap- it costs a life. Abortion is not painless and abortion is definitely not easy.
Please do your research before making the most difficult decision you may have to make in your life.

http://melissa-story.cvafr.com 

An open letter to the Church who follows Jesus...

In the last two weeks two very alarming events have occurred that shook the Church to the core, one in America and one here in South Africa, but both equally disturbing and potentially problematic for our society and for the next generation of youth. 

The first was a horrific video that was secretly filmed, exposing Planned Parenthood's senior director of medical services, Deborah Nucatola selling the organs and body parts of aborted babies.

“I’d say a lot of people want liver,” Nucatola said. “And for that reason, most providers will do this case under ultrasound guidance, so they’ll know where they’re putting their forceps.”

It is unbelievable to think that innocent babies, who are ripped and torn apart, who feel pain and who are usually fully developed by the time the abortion takes place, somewhere around 12 to 16 weeks, are now being victims of human organ trafficking too. 

These unborn babies are shown no compassion or dignity at all.

But on a positive note, the fact that human organs are being sold by the same Organization who says that the fetus is just a clump of cells, means that the Pro-Choicers are admitting that the fetus is more than a clump or a blob...because how can you make profit from "just a clump of cells."

The second shocking incident is that just two weeks ago the Amendment to the "Sexual Offences Act" that effectively decriminalises consensual sex between teens in the age group 12 – 16 years old was signed into law here in South Africa.

So how does the planned parenthood scandal impact us here in South Africa? If affects us because the patterns and trends in social and moral decay that are happening in America, are followed in South Africa too. And if Planned Parenthood can get away with this somehow, and wangle it to make it acceptable, then this could happen here too. 

In South Africa the abortion rate is an alarming. According to Professor Eddie Mhlanga, the head of obstetrics and gynaecology at Nelson R Mandela School of Medicine at the UKZN 256808 abortions have been performed in South Africa in the past three years.

And these are only the figures of abortions that are recorded.

More sex between youngsters, who are able to make and grow a baby, but who are too young to deal with the consequences of having a baby, will mean more crisis pregnancies. 

And higher abortion rates too. Therefore higher suicide and infertility rates.

Down spiral here we go.

Don't believe me? Research the effects of abortion on women.

What will become of this society in years to come? As it is pornography is being distributed by children as young as 12 years of age. More pornography means more pornography addiction, and studies show that pornography use can lead to sexual abuse, so we are literally making South Africa a more dangerous place by not standing up to this.

So dear Church of Christ... No matter what your denomination or what your differences, can I ask you with tears in my eyes to please just stand together, to unite and to fight back.

My daughter is just 8 years old and my son 5, and as a parent I cannot turn my back on this and do nothing.

Children should be protected, and this is where we step in.

So come on Church. Let us fight back. 

Let us fight for those who are most vulnerable and in need of basic human rights.

If we do not stand up and speak out for the innocent then the blood of the unborn is on our hands too.

I never want to stand before my Maker and have Him ask, "But why did you not defend those who have no voice? Why did you not tell the younger generation about me?"

Come on Church....

Let us embrace the women who have had abortions, who are hurting and are broken, let us tell them about the hope and the mercy and grace of the One who unites us.

Let us pray for our leaders and for the government as the Bible tells us to.

Let us vote for political parties who reflect the practical values of a well adjusted society.

Let us unite and get involved in Pro-Life movements such as 40 Days For Life. 

Leaders preach on this in your sermons, make your congregations aware.

And not only leaders but all of us who follow Christ because we are ALL called to be the salt and the light to this fallen and dark world.

We simply cannot be passive, we have to stand up, for the sake of our children.

Come on Church stop making things that are black and white, shades of grey.

For more information about 40 Days for Life please visit the website:

https://40daysforlife.com

A Letter To My Aborted Baby Girl:

Today is the anniversary of your death.
It has been thirteen years since I made the decision to end your life.
Thirteen years since I sacrificed your precious and innocent life for my own convenience.

I only heard the sound of your heart beat once and I remember not liking the song you sang to me. Your existence mocked me for my sins. You were the consequence of my behavior.
In my mind you were not allowed to exist until I said so. 
At your first ultra sound I remember thinking, "Get it out. Get this thing out of me."
But when you died, something inside of me died too.

If only I had known that back then...

Words fail me to express the level of remorse I feel for failing you. I am truly so sorry and ask that you will forgive me for what I have done.
I failed to protect you. I failed to be a mother to you.
And despite how it looks, despite the fact that I payed someone to poison you and slowly rip your body apart and dispose of you, I really do love you. 
Ironic I know, that in the same sentence I apologize for murdering you then say that I love you.

If only I had known back then what I know now...

I am sorry that I took your chance to live away from you. I often wonder what you would have looked like. What weird and wonderful personality quirks could you have had?
You could have been anything you wanted to be in this life. You could have been an artist or a chef or a firefighter or a writer. You could have changed the world and gone to the moon and back if that is what you wanted to do. 

But I took that away from you…

And now the world shall have to be a little less colorful because you never had the chance to leave your footprint.

There is no excuse for what I did to you. There is simply no way to justify the crime I committed against you. Sure enough, I was afraid. And only fourteen years old. But that did not give me right to murder you and all that you could have been. 

A few years after I aborted you I tried to end my own life because I hated myself so much for what I had done. It was in this dark moment that God intervened and stopped me and saved my life. I went from being an atheist to a Christian in a second.
It took a few years of walking with the Lord before I completely forgave myself.
And then God put it on my heart to tell my story of what happened... of what I did to you.
And because I spoke out against abortion, three babies who were to be aborted, now live.

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you. Before you came to birth, I consecrated you.” Jeremiah 1:5

Your death will never be in vain, and I will make it up to you by doing all that I can to prevent another mother from making the same mistake that I made. I will fight for you, until my very last breath, because every time I tell the world about you, I bring you back for just a few minutes. Your life, although short, will be a beacon of hope for many, and you are a legacy down here on earth. Until the day we meet in heaven, it is my promise to tell all who will listen about you and save as many babies as I can, because I believe that this is Gods will and plan for me.
I promise to tell your brother and sister the truth about you once they are old enough to understand.

And if ever the fact that I aborted you made you feel unloved, unwanted, unworthy or forgotten, know this:
You are loved, you are wanted and you can never be forgotten. 
I can never forget you and I can never stop loving you.

You are not my dark secret and I am not ashamed of you.
I am proud to have had you as my daughter for fourteen short weeks.
So honored to have carried you.
But so deeply sorry that I was not your mother.

I love you forever.

Your Mommy
Melissa Hertz